I'll settle for breathing today

I'm reaching for my sense of humor like a drowning person with an elusive life-raft floating JUST out of reach.  At least I'm trying, right?  God, but how will I handle taking Prednisone for one to two years?  Guess it will be what it will be and I'll keep on keeping on until I can't, or until I reach that goal.  Shhhhhpththt.  Yeah. Okay.

I'm not going to apologize for my reactions to this drug, but I do hope T gets his shit together and stops being such a pain in the ass.  I'm really not being mean when I say this, because his indifference, etc. has really made life very very hard... for both of us.  BOTH of us.  I can only do so much, take so many deep breaths, cry so much, and wish... just so much.

So many videos, so little time, so very little patience with blundering about trying like crazy to understand and deal with what's happening to me.  It's not ever going to be about my fighting to make others understand---they can, or can't, or will, or won't.  Not up to me.  Not my job.  This is the attitude I HAVE to have to make it through this and come out on the other side with some semblance of sanity left to me.

People need to realize that I don't have the energy or stamina to do research for them. If anyone asks, I tell them the gist of the disease and leave it at that.  Anything more and it just wears me out.  Can't do that.

Just saying.